The Long Road Ahead: C57

You

This novel was posted on cntranslations [dot] com, by anasiana. If you're not reading it there, you get what you get ￣へ￣)

_{Xiao Ning: "..."}
This was a question Shan Haiming had also asked him in the past. Back then, the two had only met one another through a chance encounter, and Xiao Ning was left at a loss by Shan Haiming's straightforwardness as well as having his anger ignited for some unknown reason.

Xiao Ning: "..."

_{To which, Xiao Ning responded with a sigh at the realisation that he couldn't hide it. "Chen Ying just sent me a message. She said I should be careful not to let the A/C get too cold."}
He never answered him back then.

To which, Xiao Ning responded with a sigh at the realisation that he couldn't hide it. "Chen Ying just sent me a message. She said I should be careful not to let the A/C get too cold."

_{Xiao Ning stared at him intently, not saying a word.}"Ningning, have I troubled you a lot?" Chen Ying's tone sounded especially concerned, to the point that anyone hearing it would feel a pang in their heart. "I'm sorry, that wasn't my intention. I actually prepared gifts for you every year on your birthday, but I had no way to send them to you, so can I give them all to you on your birthday this year?"

Xiao Ning stared at him intently, not saying a word.

_{Who wouldn't be? Even I didn't like the me I was then.}
Xiao Ning hadn't expected at all that Shan Haiming would again bring up this old matter at such a time without warning. Then, with a turn of the head, he met that man's gaze. The youthful eyes peering into him were far too deep, and under the dim lights, they were as black as obsidian, gleaming with devotion and purity.

Who wouldn't be? Even I didn't like the me I was then.

_{Right then, Xiaohei finally made its way over to its owners with gracefully silent steps, then curled up on the cross-legged Xiao Ning's lap, joining the rest of the family.}Right then, Xiaohei finally made its way over to its owners with gracefully silent steps, then curled up on the cross-legged Xiao Ning's lap, joining the rest of the family.

Right then, Xiaohei finally made its way over to its owners with gracefully silent steps, then curled up on the cross-legged Xiao Ning's lap, joining the rest of the family.

_{Since he said all this, Shan Haiming let the matter be. He then dragged him along to do the dishes, in addition to taking care of Tangtang and Xiaohei, who had to get their baths.}Lying in the dark, Xiao Ning stared at his phone until the screen automatically dimmed; only then did he again return it to the stand beside him. His movements alerted the one behind him and caused an arm to encircle his waist, holding him tight.

Since he said all this, Shan Haiming let the matter be. He then dragged him along to do the dishes, in addition to taking care of Tangtang and Xiaohei, who had to get their baths.

_{But Chen Ying was rather tenacious. Even though Xiao Ning hadn't sent her any replies, she still messaged him without end. Then, after only sending messages for half a month, she began sending him gifts as well.}Xiao Ning closed his eyes, chuckling softly. "Even if you had met me back then, you wouldn't be able to stand the sight of me. It was only after improving myself that I was even able to get to this point gradually."

But Chen Ying was rather tenacious. Even though Xiao Ning hadn't sent her any replies, she still messaged him without end. Then, after only sending messages for half a month, she began sending him gifts as well.

_{Lying in the dark, Xiao Ning stared at his phone until the screen automatically dimmed; only then did he again return it to the stand beside him. His movements alerted the one behind him and caused an arm to encircle his waist, holding him tight.}
Shan Haiming's fingers then traced his trembling lips, his next words spoken both caringly and provocatively in a whisper: "Tell me... what are you so afraid of?"

Lying in the dark, Xiao Ning stared at his phone until the screen automatically dimmed; only then did he again return it to the stand beside him. His movements alerted the one behind him and caused an arm to encircle his waist, holding him tight.

_YouWho wouldn't be? Even I didn't like the me I was then.

You

"Ningning, have I troubled you a lot?" Chen Ying's tone sounded especially concerned, to the point that anyone hearing it would feel a pang in their heart. "I'm sorry, that wasn't my intention. I actually prepared gifts for you every year on your birthday, but I had no way to send them to you, so can I give them all to you on your birthday this year?"

_{Shan Haiming then asked outrightly, "So you're afraid you won't have any control? You're afraid of what your mother will do to you?"}These words of hers were rather touching, and Xiao Ning was in no way a person with a heart of stone. So, following a long sigh, he replied to her, "Um, alright. But don't send anything else, okay? There's no need to spend so much money."

Shan Haiming then asked outrightly, "So you're afraid you won't have any control? You're afraid of what your mother will do to you?"

_{While in bed, Xiao Ning received a message from Chen Ying. It was a simple one, reminding him not to turn on the air conditioning too high at night. The number she sent the message from seemed to have been the current one she got in A-City. She was probably afraid Xiao Ning hadn't saved the one from before.}It was precisely his not seeming to have only experienced a good past that had created the parts of him that Xiao Ning found the most attractive.

While in bed, Xiao Ning received a message from Chen Ying. It was a simple one, reminding him not to turn on the air conditioning too high at night. The number she sent the message from seemed to have been the current one she got in A-City. She was probably afraid Xiao Ning hadn't saved the one from before.

_{"Well, that's because you always refuse to say it properly." Shan Haiming sat up and then helped Xiao Ning sit upright, too. Then, thinking its masters were playing, Tangtang rushed over and encircled Shan Haiming twice before lying down between the two.}
Shan Haiming then leaned to join their lips, licking gently. Then, upon gaining such a meek response from Xiao Ning, he weaved his fingers through Xiao Ning's smooth hair in a way that was both flirtatious and consoling. "Why are you always trembling like this? Like a squirrel from next door that came over to borrow soy sauce."

"Well, that's because you always refuse to say it properly." Shan Haiming sat up and then helped Xiao Ning sit upright, too. Then, thinking its masters were playing, Tangtang rushed over and encircled Shan Haiming twice before lying down between the two.

_{He never answered him back then.}
Lost in the depths of their feelings, Xiao Ning's body was made so soft by Shan Haiming's kissing that he slipped from his seat onto the floor, and because of the arms he had encircling Shan Haiming's waist, he also dragged the upper half of that man's body that went with the flow to slip down too. But that man did nothing else beyond this point, his hands placed on either side of Xiao Ning's head as he hovered above, gazing down at him.

He never answered him back then.

_{It was precisely his not seeming to have only experienced a good past that had created the parts of him that Xiao Ning found the most attractive.}His not being qualified to stand beside Shan Haiming no longer mattered; he could just become a better person. If Shan Haiming wanted to leave him, he would try to salvage their relationship instead of just meekly and obediently backing away.

It was precisely his not seeming to have only experienced a good past that had created the parts of him that Xiao Ning found the most attractive.

_{Sensing his restlessness, Shan Haiming asked from behind him, "Can't sleep?"}This was strange—quite strange, in fact. It was rare for Shan Haiming to act like this. So, running his fingers along his temples, Xiao Ning asked him, "What's on your mind right now?"

Sensing his restlessness, Shan Haiming asked from behind him, "Can't sleep?"

_{But that was true for everything else except for one: this.}"Sorry to disappoint you," Xiao Ning then added, "but as a kid, I was the kind that was not that likeable."

But that was true for everything else except for one: this.

_{This was strange—quite strange, in fact. It was rare for Shan Haiming to act like this. So, running his fingers along his temples, Xiao Ning asked him, "What's on your mind right now?"}
Xiao Ning was left temporarily speechless by the intensity of the stare befalling him—a gaze that resembled one of a person who had claimed a throne.

This was strange—quite strange, in fact. It was rare for Shan Haiming to act like this. So, running his fingers along his temples, Xiao Ning asked him, "What's on your mind right now?"

_{Shan Haiming's brows wrinkled as he then asked, "What are you all smiles about?"}
He was a person who lived his life by the book—a person who was left restless when something unforeseen happened to him. The reason for this was simple: any time an unexpected event occurred in his life, it was always a bad thing. Change, for him, had become indicative of a loss.

Shan Haiming's brows wrinkled as he then asked, "What are you all smiles about?"

_{This was the best-unexpected event he could think of.}While in bed, Xiao Ning received a message from Chen Ying. It was a simple one, reminding him not to turn on the air conditioning too high at night. The number she sent the message from seemed to have been the current one she got in A-City. She was probably afraid Xiao Ning hadn't saved the one from before.

This was the best-unexpected event he could think of.

_{But Chen Ying was rather tenacious. Even though Xiao Ning hadn't sent her any replies, she still messaged him without end. Then, after only sending messages for half a month, she began sending him gifts as well.}"Yeah. I'll get in touch with her again." Xiao Ning then chuckled to himself. This guy is seriously treating me like a kid, isn't he? Nodding, he then added, "But I think we both need some time to properly digest this first meeting of ours."

_{Shan Haiming then asked outrightly, "So you're afraid you won't have any control? You're afraid of what your mother will do to you?"}
He had lost his mother. He had lost his father. He had lost his home. He had lost his chance at being loved. If he had his way, what he truly desired was the ability to live a quiet and peaceful life without any unpredictability.

Shan Haiming then asked outrightly, "So you're afraid you won't have any control? You're afraid of what your mother will do to you?"

After he had lost hold of his feelings that day, Xiao Ning hadn't gotten that riled up again, and on top of that, he still wasn't sure how he could get along with Chen Ying. After all, there were a lot of years of estrangement between them, and accepting the presence of a mother in his life again suddenly made him feel uneasy.

_{Shan Haiming then leaned to join their lips, licking gently. Then, upon gaining such a meek response from Xiao Ning, he weaved his fingers through Xiao Ning's smooth hair in a way that was both flirtatious and consoling. "Why are you always trembling like this? Like a squirrel from next door that came over to borrow soy sauce."}
But that was true for everything else except for one: this.

Shan Haiming then leaned to join their lips, licking gently. Then, upon gaining such a meek response from Xiao Ning, he weaved his fingers through Xiao Ning's smooth hair in a way that was both flirtatious and consoling. "Why are you always trembling like this? Like a squirrel from next door that came over to borrow soy sauce."

_YouShan Haiming chuckled, unable to tell the meaning behind those words as he asked, "Did it touch your heart?"

You

_{Xiao Ning reached out his hand, cupping Shan Haiming's face. His heart felt as though a spotlight descended upon it, followed by a sudden and painful surge of joy from somewhere inside. The feeling told him one thing with certainty: that he had, for some time now, fallen deeply in love with this man.}
This was the best-unexpected event he could think of.

Xiao Ning reached out his hand, cupping Shan Haiming's face. His heart felt as though a spotlight descended upon it, followed by a sudden and painful surge of joy from somewhere inside. The feeling told him one thing with certainty: that he had, for some time now, fallen deeply in love with this man.

_{"Yeah. I'll get in touch with her again." Xiao Ning then chuckled to himself. {This guy is seriously treating me like a kid, isn't he?} Nodding, he then added, "But I think we both need some time to properly digest this first meeting of ours."}Smiling as if nothing was amiss, Xiao Ning chuckled as he replied, "We were talking about Chen Ying, won't we? I'm smiling because of how we went from talking to rolling around on the floor."

"Yeah. I'll get in touch with her again." Xiao Ning then chuckled to himself. This guy is seriously treating me like a kid, isn't he? Nodding, he then added, "But I think we both need some time to properly digest this first meeting of ours."

_{Shan Haiming chuckled, unable to tell the meaning behind those words as he asked, "Did it touch your heart?"}But that was true for everything else except for one: this.

Shan Haiming chuckled, unable to tell the meaning behind those words as he asked, "Did it touch your heart?"

Chen Ying sent him two to three messages a day, saying things like take care not to get sick; remember to eat your meals; stay hydrated; and be careful on his way to and from work. Xiao Ning was a bit new to this type of indirect concern. These kinds of superfluous messages were something he had never received before. Lu Yan was naturally out of the question; he didn't have it in him to do something like that at all. As for Chen Shuyun, the target of all her nagging had been Lu Yan, so Xiao Ning was nothing but a middleman. As for San Haiming, he would never engage in this type of drawn-out prodding.

_{Shan Haiming remained speechless for a moment, his lips then curving into a mischievous smile as he said, "Looks like there's been progress."}
Xiao Ning reached out his hand, cupping Shan Haiming's face. His heart felt as though a spotlight descended upon it, followed by a sudden and painful surge of joy from somewhere inside. The feeling told him one thing with certainty: that he had, for some time now, fallen deeply in love with this man.

Shan Haiming remained speechless for a moment, his lips then curving into a mischievous smile as he said, "Looks like there's been progress."

_{Shan Haiming's fingers then traced his trembling lips, his next words spoken both caringly and provocatively in a whisper: "Tell me... what are you so afraid of?"}
His not being qualified to stand beside Shan Haiming no longer mattered; he could just become a better person. If Shan Haiming wanted to leave him, he would try to salvage their relationship instead of just meekly and obediently backing away.

Shan Haiming's fingers then traced his trembling lips, his next words spoken both caringly and provocatively in a whisper: "Tell me... what are you so afraid of?"

_{Lost in the depths of their feelings, Xiao Ning's body was made so soft by Shan Haiming's kissing that he slipped from his seat onto the floor, and because of the arms he had encircling Shan Haiming's waist, he also dragged the upper half of that man's body that went with the flow to slip down too. But that man did nothing else beyond this point, his hands placed on either side of Xiao Ning's head as he hovered above, gazing down at him.}This was strange—quite strange, in fact. It was rare for Shan Haiming to act like this. So, running his fingers along his temples, Xiao Ning asked him, "What's on your mind right now?"

Lost in the depths of their feelings, Xiao Ning's body was made so soft by Shan Haiming's kissing that he slipped from his seat onto the floor, and because of the arms he had encircling Shan Haiming's waist, he also dragged the upper half of that man's body that went with the flow to slip down too. But that man did nothing else beyond this point, his hands placed on either side of Xiao Ning's head as he hovered above, gazing down at him.

_{Xiao Ning smiled at this, as, regarding such a point, he also thought the same of Shan Haiming. In an environment like his, if it were a different person, odds are they would've developed a completely different attitude. Shan Haiming wasn't arrogant and twisted, nor was he a person who detested the world. Instead, he had grown into a fine man—an extremely fine one at that.}Hence, these messages left Xiao Ning feeling rather conflicted. The image of Chen Ying's crying face that day kept reappearing before his eyes, and he sympathised with the pain she felt at not getting a response.

Xiao Ning smiled at this, as, regarding such a point, he also thought the same of Shan Haiming. In an environment like his, if it were a different person, odds are they would've developed a completely different attitude. Shan Haiming wasn't arrogant and twisted, nor was he a person who detested the world. Instead, he had grown into a fine man—an extremely fine one at that.

Xiao Ning hadn't expected at all that Shan Haiming would again bring up this old matter at such a time without warning. Then, with a turn of the head, he met that man's gaze. The youthful eyes peering into him were far too deep, and under the dim lights, they were as black as obsidian, gleaming with devotion and purity.

_{Looking at him with a smile, Xiao Ning replied simply, "You."}
This realisation made two distinct and opposing feelings swell within Xiao Ning simultaneously: fear and happiness.

Looking at him with a smile, Xiao Ning replied simply, "You."

_{Xiao Ning, whose hand lay on Tangtang's head while lost in thought, slowly nodded.}
Shan Haiming's brows wrinkled as he then asked, "What are you all smiles about?"

Xiao Ning, whose hand lay on Tangtang's head while lost in thought, slowly nodded.

_{Since he said all this, Shan Haiming let the matter be. He then dragged him along to do the dishes, in addition to taking care of Tangtang and Xiaohei, who had to get their baths.}
To have such a matter clarified in such a situation while discussing such a topic was quite amusing, and it is, unfortunately, something I can't tell you.

Since he said all this, Shan Haiming let the matter be. He then dragged him along to do the dishes, in addition to taking care of Tangtang and Xiaohei, who had to get their baths.

This was strange—quite strange, in fact. It was rare for Shan Haiming to act like this. So, running his fingers along his temples, Xiao Ning asked him, "What's on your mind right now?"

_{He was a person who lived his life by the book—a person who was left restless when something unforeseen happened to him. The reason for this was simple: any time an unexpected event occurred in his life, it was always a bad thing. Change, for him, had become indicative of a loss.}Obviously, she hadn't dropped by Xiao Ning's house in person, probably because she didn't know his address. So the gifts were sent to his office, and because she didn't know what his hobbies and preferences were, the gifts sent were things a man would usually like, such as lighters, wallets, and cologne.

He was a person who lived his life by the book—a person who was left restless when something unforeseen happened to him. The reason for this was simple: any time an unexpected event occurred in his life, it was always a bad thing. Change, for him, had become indicative of a loss.

_{Wrapped in that scent as well as his warmth, Xiao Ning lay there while his mind echoed those words.}
Smiling as if nothing was amiss, Xiao Ning chuckled as he replied, "We were talking about Chen Ying, won't we? I'm smiling because of how we went from talking to rolling around on the floor."

Wrapped in that scent as well as his warmth, Xiao Ning lay there while his mind echoed those words.

_{Xiao Ning lowered his head, connecting that man's lips with his own before they shared a gentle kiss.}Xiao Ning stared at him intently, not saying a word.

Xiao Ning lowered his head, connecting that man's lips with his own before they shared a gentle kiss.

_{Brimming with interest, Shan Haiming asked, "Did no one take pity on the little xiao-bai-cai that was you?" (Little Bok Choy)}"Well, that's because you always refuse to say it properly." Shan Haiming sat up and then helped Xiao Ning sit upright, too. Then, thinking its masters were playing, Tangtang rushed over and encircled Shan Haiming twice before lying down between the two.

Brimming with interest, Shan Haiming asked, "Did no one take pity on the little xiao-bai-cai that was you?" (Little Bok Choy)

_{Embarrassed beyond measure, Xiao Ning had no choice but to contact Chen Ying. He thanked her for the concern and asked her not to send any more gifts. The second he sent this message, Chen Ying called him in return.}
"Well, that's because you always refuse to say it properly." Shan Haiming sat up and then helped Xiao Ning sit upright, too. Then, thinking its masters were playing, Tangtang rushed over and encircled Shan Haiming twice before lying down between the two.

Embarrassed beyond measure, Xiao Ning had no choice but to contact Chen Ying. He thanked her for the concern and asked her not to send any more gifts. The second he sent this message, Chen Ying called him in return.

_{Smiling as if nothing was amiss, Xiao Ning chuckled as he replied, "We were talking about Chen Ying, won't we? I'm smiling because of how we went from talking to rolling around on the floor."}Shan Haiming outstretched his hand, caressing Xiao Ning's face, seeming a bit distracted himself.

Smiling as if nothing was amiss, Xiao Ning chuckled as he replied, "We were talking about Chen Ying, won't we? I'm smiling because of how we went from talking to rolling around on the floor."

_{"It's a pity I didn't get to meet you back then," said Shan Haiming.}But it was also because of this empathy that those unpleasant and dust-laden memories of his were constantly roused, and he found it difficult to contact Chen Ying. So those messages she sent were only saved while there was no response given.

"It's a pity I didn't get to meet you back then," said Shan Haiming.

_{"No, it's not like that..." Xiao Ning felt the suffocating feeling that had ignited in his chest quell, and all that remained was exhaustion that made his body shrink into the bed. "I just remembered something from the past. I recalled how unpleasant my life had become after she had left."}
"I honestly did hate Chen Ying, but that was only when I was still a child. Honestly, it's not even about forgiveness." Xiao Ning stroked Tangtang's head, while from a distance, Xiaohei swung its tail and looked at them intently. "I just... It's just that I don't like it when there are too many variables."

"No, it's not like that..." Xiao Ning felt the suffocating feeling that had ignited in his chest quell, and all that remained was exhaustion that made his body shrink into the bed. "I just remembered something from the past. I recalled how unpleasant my life had become after she had left."

_{Xiao Ning stared at him intently, not saying a word.}Xiao Ning, whose hand lay on Tangtang's head while lost in thought, slowly nodded.

Xiao Ning stared at him intently, not saying a word.

_{After he hung up the phone, Xiao Ning stared at it in a daze.}Wrapped in that scent as well as his warmth, Xiao Ning lay there while his mind echoed those words.

After he hung up the phone, Xiao Ning stared at it in a daze.

_{Lying in the dark, Xiao Ning stared at his phone until the screen automatically dimmed; only then did he again return it to the stand beside him. His movements alerted the one behind him and caused an arm to encircle his waist, holding him tight.}Since he said all this, Shan Haiming let the matter be. He then dragged him along to do the dishes, in addition to taking care of Tangtang and Xiaohei, who had to get their baths.

_{Xiao Ning lowered his gaze, petting Xiaohei. Shan Haiming, from the side, then moved to caress Xiao Ning, his tone as he spoke filled with maturity. "You need to learn to grow up too."}
Shan Haiming then asked outrightly, "So you're afraid you won't have any control? You're afraid of what your mother will do to you?"

Xiao Ning lowered his gaze, petting Xiaohei. Shan Haiming, from the side, then moved to caress Xiao Ning, his tone as he spoke filled with maturity. "You need to learn to grow up too."

_{Chen Ying sent him two to three messages a day, saying things like take care not to get sick; remember to eat your meals; stay hydrated; and be careful on his way to and from work. Xiao Ning was a bit new to this type of indirect concern.}This was a question Shan Haiming had also asked him in the past. Back then, the two had only met one another through a chance encounter, and Xiao Ning was left at a loss by Shan Haiming's straightforwardness as well as having his anger ignited for some unknown reason.

_{But it was also because of this empathy that those unpleasant and dust-laden memories of his were constantly roused, and he found it difficult to contact Chen Ying. So those messages she sent were only saved while there was no response given.}
Xiao Ning, whose hand lay on Tangtang's head while lost in thought, slowly nodded.

But it was also because of this empathy that those unpleasant and dust-laden memories of his were constantly roused, and he found it difficult to contact Chen Ying. So those messages she sent were only saved while there was no response given.

_{This was strange—quite strange, in fact. It was rare for Shan Haiming to act like this. So, running his fingers along his temples, Xiao Ning asked him, "What's on your mind right now?"}Back then, Xiao Ning didn't talk to others, and even he didn't like the timid and fearful child he remembered, who had a dirty and uncared-for appearance. The way he looked at others also made him look as though he was a bit slow-witted. What's more, and possibly the result of him being too accustomed to the quiet that came with always being alone, he would often stare intently at one spot for far too long until his gaze was filled with darkness.

This was strange—quite strange, in fact. It was rare for Shan Haiming to act like this. So, running his fingers along his temples, Xiao Ning asked him, "What's on your mind right now?"

_{Chen Ying was very satisfied with this attitude of his and fully agreed to his request.}
Right then, Xiaohei finally made its way over to its owners with gracefully silent steps, then curled up on the cross-legged Xiao Ning's lap, joining the rest of the family.

Chen Ying was very satisfied with this attitude of his and fully agreed to his request.

_{He also hooked Xiao Ning's neck while he spoke.}While in bed, Xiao Ning received a message from Chen Ying. It was a simple one, reminding him not to turn on the air conditioning too high at night. The number she sent the message from seemed to have been the current one she got in A-City. She was probably afraid Xiao Ning hadn't saved the one from before.

He also hooked Xiao Ning's neck while he spoke.

_{These words of hers were rather touching, and Xiao Ning was in no way a person with a heart of stone. So, following a long sigh, he replied to her, "Um, alright. But don't send anything else, okay? There's no need to spend so much money."}Shan Haiming then leaned to join their lips, licking gently. Then, upon gaining such a meek response from Xiao Ning, he weaved his fingers through Xiao Ning's smooth hair in a way that was both flirtatious and consoling. "Why are you always trembling like this? Like a squirrel from next door that came over to borrow soy sauce."

These words of hers were rather touching, and Xiao Ning was in no way a person with a heart of stone. So, following a long sigh, he replied to her, "Um, alright. But don't send anything else, okay? There's no need to spend so much money."

_{"Yeah. I'll get in touch with her again." Xiao Ning then chuckled to himself. {This guy is seriously treating me like a kid, isn't he?} Nodding, he then added, "But I think we both need some time to properly digest this first meeting of ours."}Chen Ying was very satisfied with this attitude of his and fully agreed to his request.

_{Loss was the thing that scared him, and this man was the thing he was afraid of losing the most.}
Xiao Ning lowered his gaze, petting Xiaohei. Shan Haiming, from the side, then moved to caress Xiao Ning, his tone as he spoke filled with maturity. "You need to learn to grow up too."

Loss was the thing that scared him, and this man was the thing he was afraid of losing the most.

_{But that was true for everything else except for one: this.}
Xiao Ning: "..."

But that was true for everything else except for one: this.

_{Lost in the depths of their feelings, Xiao Ning's body was made so soft by Shan Haiming's kissing that he slipped from his seat onto the floor, and because of the arms he had encircling Shan Haiming's waist, he also dragged the upper half of that man's body that went with the flow to slip down too. But that man did nothing else beyond this point, his hands placed on either side of Xiao Ning's head as he hovered above, gazing down at him.}
Shan Haiming then asked, "Can you handle this matter on your own?"

_{Xiao Ning, whose hand lay on Tangtang's head while lost in thought, slowly nodded.}"Ningning, have I troubled you a lot?" Chen Ying's tone sounded especially concerned, to the point that anyone hearing it would feel a pang in their heart. "I'm sorry, that wasn't my intention. I actually prepared gifts for you every year on your birthday, but I had no way to send them to you, so can I give them all to you on your birthday this year?"

Xiao Ning, whose hand lay on Tangtang's head while lost in thought, slowly nodded.

_{Shan Haiming was leaning on the sofa beside him, feet propped on Tangtang's back. After turning to look at Xiao Ning's face, he laid his head on his dazed partner's lap and asked, while looking up at him, "Has your heart softened?"}
"Yeah. I'll get in touch with her again." Xiao Ning then chuckled to himself. This guy is seriously treating me like a kid, isn't he? Nodding, he then added, "But I think we both need some time to properly digest this first meeting of ours."

Shan Haiming was leaning on the sofa beside him, feet propped on Tangtang's back. After turning to look at Xiao Ning's face, he laid his head on his dazed partner's lap and asked, while looking up at him, "Has your heart softened?"

_{{Who wouldn't be? Even I didn't like the me I was then.}}Smiling as if nothing was amiss, Xiao Ning chuckled as he replied, "We were talking about Chen Ying, won't we? I'm smiling because of how we went from talking to rolling around on the floor."

Who wouldn't be? Even I didn't like the me I was then.

_{His not being qualified to stand beside Shan Haiming no longer mattered; he could just become a better person. If Shan Haiming wanted to leave him, he would try to salvage their relationship instead of just meekly and obediently backing away.}
Since he said all this, Shan Haiming let the matter be. He then dragged him along to do the dishes, in addition to taking care of Tangtang and Xiaohei, who had to get their baths.

His not being qualified to stand beside Shan Haiming no longer mattered; he could just become a better person. If Shan Haiming wanted to leave him, he would try to salvage their relationship instead of just meekly and obediently backing away.

_{Lu Yan must've been very annoyed by me in the beginning too, yeah?}
While in bed, Xiao Ning received a message from Chen Ying. It was a simple one, reminding him not to turn on the air conditioning too high at night. The number she sent the message from seemed to have been the current one she got in A-City. She was probably afraid Xiao Ning hadn't saved the one from before.

Lu Yan must've been very annoyed by me in the beginning too, yeah?

_{After he hung up the phone, Xiao Ning stared at it in a daze.}Brimming with interest, Shan Haiming asked, "Did no one take pity on the little xiao-bai-cai that was you?" (Little Bok Choy)

After he hung up the phone, Xiao Ning stared at it in a daze.

_{Xiao Ning lowered his head, connecting that man's lips with his own before they shared a gentle kiss.}
Lying in the dark, Xiao Ning stared at his phone until the screen automatically dimmed; only then did he again return it to the stand beside him. His movements alerted the one behind him and caused an arm to encircle his waist, holding him tight.

Xiao Ning lowered his head, connecting that man's lips with his own before they shared a gentle kiss.

_{Right then, Xiaohei finally made its way over to its owners with gracefully silent steps, then curled up on the cross-legged Xiao Ning's lap, joining the rest of the family.}"Well, that's because you always refuse to say it properly." Shan Haiming sat up and then helped Xiao Ning sit upright, too. Then, thinking its masters were playing, Tangtang rushed over and encircled Shan Haiming twice before lying down between the two.

Right then, Xiaohei finally made its way over to its owners with gracefully silent steps, then curled up on the cross-legged Xiao Ning's lap, joining the rest of the family.

_{This realisation made two distinct and opposing feelings swell within Xiao Ning simultaneously: fear and happiness.}
Recalling his past, looking back at those memories, was the thing he wanted to do the least, and the reason he didn't wish to meet Chen Ying. With only a glance—with only one sentence—all those hard-to-forget memories were evoked, leaving him tossing and turning, leaving him sleepless.

This realisation made two distinct and opposing feelings swell within Xiao Ning simultaneously: fear and happiness.

_{This was strange—quite strange, in fact. It was rare for Shan Haiming to act like this. So, running his fingers along his temples, Xiao Ning asked him, "What's on your mind right now?"}But it was also because of this empathy that those unpleasant and dust-laden memories of his were constantly roused, and he found it difficult to contact Chen Ying. So those messages she sent were only saved while there was no response given.

This was strange—quite strange, in fact. It was rare for Shan Haiming to act like this. So, running his fingers along his temples, Xiao Ning asked him, "What's on your mind right now?"

_{Xiao Ning's hands stalled, and Shan Haiming's eyes shot open, with him then going on to ask, "What are you thinking about?"}"I honestly did hate Chen Ying, but that was only when I was still a child. Honestly, it's not even about forgiveness." Xiao Ning stroked Tangtang's head, while from a distance, Xiaohei swung its tail and looked at them intently. "I just... It's just that I don't like it when there are too many variables."

Xiao Ning's hands stalled, and Shan Haiming's eyes shot open, with him then going on to ask, "What are you thinking about?"

Hence, these messages left Xiao Ning feeling rather conflicted. The image of Chen Ying's crying face that day kept reappearing before his eyes, and he sympathised with the pain she felt at not getting a response.

_{Shan Haiming teased him when he saw this. "If you didn't know any better, you'd think you were her sugar baby or something."}
To which, Xiao Ning responded with a sigh at the realisation that he couldn't hide it. "Chen Ying just sent me a message. She said I should be careful not to let the A/C get too cold."

Shan Haiming teased him when he saw this. "If you didn't know any better, you'd think you were her sugar baby or something."

_{But Chen Ying was rather tenacious. Even though Xiao Ning hadn't sent her any replies, she still messaged him without end. Then, after only sending messages for half a month, she began sending him gifts as well.}
Shan Haiming chuckled, unable to tell the meaning behind those words as he asked, "Did it touch your heart?"

_{"Ningning, have I troubled you a lot?" Chen Ying's tone sounded especially concerned, to the point that anyone hearing it would feel a pang in their heart. "I'm sorry, that wasn't my intention. I actually prepared gifts for you every year on your birthday, but I had no way to send them to you, so can I give them all to you on your birthday this year?"}After he had lost hold of his feelings that day, Xiao Ning hadn't gotten that riled up again, and on top of that, he still wasn't sure how he could get along with Chen Ying. After all, there were a lot of years of estrangement between them, and accepting the presence of a mother in his life again suddenly made him feel uneasy.

_{This was the best-unexpected event he could think of.}
"No, it's not like that..." Xiao Ning felt the suffocating feeling that had ignited in his chest quell, and all that remained was exhaustion that made his body shrink into the bed. "I just remembered something from the past. I recalled how unpleasant my life had become after she had left."

This was the best-unexpected event he could think of.

_N/AXiao Ning: "..."

N/A

_{Since he said all this, Shan Haiming let the matter be. He then dragged him along to do the dishes, in addition to taking care of Tangtang and Xiaohei, who had to get their baths.}He was a person who lived his life by the book—a person who was left restless when something unforeseen happened to him. The reason for this was simple: any time an unexpected event occurred in his life, it was always a bad thing. Change, for him, had become indicative of a loss.

Since he said all this, Shan Haiming let the matter be. He then dragged him along to do the dishes, in addition to taking care of Tangtang and Xiaohei, who had to get their baths.

_{Right then, Xiaohei finally made its way over to its owners with gracefully silent steps, then curled up on the cross-legged Xiao Ning's lap, joining the rest of the family.}
Brimming with interest, Shan Haiming asked, "Did no one take pity on the little xiao-bai-cai that was you?" (Little Bok Choy)

Right then, Xiaohei finally made its way over to its owners with gracefully silent steps, then curled up on the cross-legged Xiao Ning's lap, joining the rest of the family.

_{{Lu Yan must've been very annoyed by me in the beginning too, yeah?}}Obviously, she hadn't dropped by Xiao Ning's house in person, probably because she didn't know his address. So the gifts were sent to his office, and because she didn't know what his hobbies and preferences were, the gifts sent were things a man would usually like, such as lighters, wallets, and cologne.

Lu Yan must've been very annoyed by me in the beginning too, yeah?

_{He also hooked Xiao Ning's neck while he spoke.}Looking at him with a smile, Xiao Ning replied simply, "You."

He also hooked Xiao Ning's neck while he spoke.

_{Shan Haiming chuckled, unable to tell the meaning behind those words as he asked, "Did it touch your heart?"}"It's not a matter of whether my heart softened or not..." Xiao Ning looked down at him to reply with a smile and a frown.

Shan Haiming chuckled, unable to tell the meaning behind those words as he asked, "Did it touch your heart?"

_{"Nothing much." Shan Haiming closed his eyes, feeling soothed by Xiao Ning's caressing touch through his hair, then added, "I think you're someone worthy of praise. You had so many troubles for so long, yet you still managed to not become a twisted person."}
Back then, Xiao Ning didn't talk to others, and even he didn't like the timid and fearful child he remembered, who had a dirty and uncared-for appearance. The way he looked at others also made him look as though he was a bit slow-witted. What's more, and possibly the result of him being too accustomed to the quiet that came with always being alone, he would often stare intently at one spot for far too long until his gaze was filled with darkness.

"Nothing much." Shan Haiming closed his eyes, feeling soothed by Xiao Ning's caressing touch through his hair, then added, "I think you're someone worthy of praise. You had so many troubles for so long, yet you still managed to not become a twisted person."

_{This was the best-unexpected event he could think of.}Lost in the depths of their feelings, Xiao Ning's body was made so soft by Shan Haiming's kissing that he slipped from his seat onto the floor, and because of the arms he had encircling Shan Haiming's waist, he also dragged the upper half of that man's body that went with the flow to slip down too. But that man did nothing else beyond this point, his hands placed on either side of Xiao Ning's head as he hovered above, gazing down at him.

This was the best-unexpected event he could think of.

_{After pressing his lips on Xiao Ning's forehead, Shan Haiming quickly fell asleep.}
Lu Yan must've been very annoyed by me in the beginning too, yeah?

After pressing his lips on Xiao Ning's forehead, Shan Haiming quickly fell asleep.

_{This was a question Shan Haiming had also asked him in the past. Back then, the two had only met one another through a chance encounter, and Xiao Ning was left at a loss by Shan Haiming's straightforwardness as well as having his anger ignited for some unknown reason.}But it was also because of this empathy that those unpleasant and dust-laden memories of his were constantly roused, and he found it difficult to contact Chen Ying. So those messages she sent were only saved while there was no response given.

This was a question Shan Haiming had also asked him in the past. Back then, the two had only met one another through a chance encounter, and Xiao Ning was left at a loss by Shan Haiming's straightforwardness as well as having his anger ignited for some unknown reason.

_◈◇◈Shan Haiming then leaned to join their lips, licking gently. Then, upon gaining such a meek response from Xiao Ning, he weaved his fingers through Xiao Ning's smooth hair in a way that was both flirtatious and consoling. "Why are you always trembling like this? Like a squirrel from next door that came over to borrow soy sauce."

◈◇◈

_{Recalling his past, looking back at those memories, was the thing he wanted to do the least, and the reason he didn't wish to meet Chen Ying. With only a glance—with only one sentence—all those hard-to-forget memories were evoked, leaving him tossing and turning, leaving him sleepless.}
Who wouldn't be? Even I didn't like the me I was then.

Recalling his past, looking back at those memories, was the thing he wanted to do the least, and the reason he didn't wish to meet Chen Ying. With only a glance—with only one sentence—all those hard-to-forget memories were evoked, leaving him tossing and turning, leaving him sleepless.

_{"Well, that's because you always refuse to say it properly." Shan Haiming sat up and then helped Xiao Ning sit upright, too. Then, thinking its masters were playing, Tangtang rushed over and encircled Shan Haiming twice before lying down between the two.}Lost in the depths of their feelings, Xiao Ning's body was made so soft by Shan Haiming's kissing that he slipped from his seat onto the floor, and because of the arms he had encircling Shan Haiming's waist, he also dragged the upper half of that man's body that went with the flow to slip down too. But that man did nothing else beyond this point, his hands placed on either side of Xiao Ning's head as he hovered above, gazing down at him.

_{This was a question Shan Haiming had also asked him in the past. Back then, the two had only met one another through a chance encounter, and Xiao Ning was left at a loss by Shan Haiming's straightforwardness as well as having his anger ignited for some unknown reason.}Xiao Ning closed his eyes, chuckling softly. "Even if you had met me back then, you wouldn't be able to stand the sight of me. It was only after improving myself that I was even able to get to this point gradually."

_{Back then, Xiao Ning didn't talk to others, and even he didn't like the timid and fearful child he remembered, who had a dirty and uncared-for appearance. The way he looked at others also made him look as though he was a bit slow-witted.}
"It's a pity I didn't get to meet you back then," said Shan Haiming.

Back then, Xiao Ning didn't talk to others, and even he didn't like the timid and fearful child he remembered, who had a dirty and uncared-for appearance. The way he looked at others also made him look as though he was a bit slow-witted. What's more, and possibly the result of him being too accustomed to the quiet that came with always being alone, he would often stare intently at one spot for far too long until his gaze was filled with darkness.

_{He never answered him back then.}Shan Haiming then leaned to join their lips, licking gently. Then, upon gaining such a meek response from Xiao Ning, he weaved his fingers through Xiao Ning's smooth hair in a way that was both flirtatious and consoling. "Why are you always trembling like this? Like a squirrel from next door that came over to borrow soy sauce."

He never answered him back then.

_{This was a question Shan Haiming had also asked him in the past. Back then, the two had only met one another through a chance encounter, and Xiao Ning was left at a loss by Shan Haiming's straightforwardness as well as having his anger ignited for some unknown reason.}
Xiao Ning closed his eyes, chuckling softly. "Even if you had met me back then, you wouldn't be able to stand the sight of me. It was only after improving myself that I was even able to get to this point gradually."

_{Shan Haiming was leaning on the sofa beside him, feet propped on Tangtang's back. After turning to look at Xiao Ning's face, he laid his head on his dazed partner's lap and asked, while looking up at him, "Has your heart softened?"}"No, it's not like that..." Xiao Ning felt the suffocating feeling that had ignited in his chest quell, and all that remained was exhaustion that made his body shrink into the bed. "I just remembered something from the past. I recalled how unpleasant my life had become after she had left."

_{Loss was the thing that scared him, and this man was the thing he was afraid of losing the most.}◈◇◈

Loss was the thing that scared him, and this man was the thing he was afraid of losing the most.

_{"Sorry to disappoint you," Xiao Ning then added, "but as a kid, I was the kind that was not that likeable."}
In the dimly lit room, Xiao Ning's mellow tone resounded. Even the tranquillity of the night seemed to have been enveloped in his smooth masculine tone and, with it, gave a feeling of peace. It lulled Shan Haiming, urging him to sleep, so his next words came out as a whisper: "So this is just right then, yeah?"

"Sorry to disappoint you," Xiao Ning then added, "but as a kid, I was the kind that was not that likeable."

_{Shan Haiming then asked, "Can you handle this matter on your own?"}iana: That soy-sauce squirrel thing is, um... idk. Another Haiming-ism.

Shan Haiming then asked, "Can you handle this matter on your own?"

_{Lying in the dark, Xiao Ning stared at his phone until the screen automatically dimmed; only then did he again return it to the stand beside him. His movements alerted the one behind him and caused an arm to encircle his waist, holding him tight.}"Nothing much." Shan Haiming closed his eyes, feeling soothed by Xiao Ning's caressing touch through his hair, then added, "I think you're someone worthy of praise. You had so many troubles for so long, yet you still managed to not become a twisted person."

_{He had lost his mother. He had lost his father. He had lost his home. He had lost his chance at being loved. If he had his way, what he truly desired was the ability to live a quiet and peaceful life without any unpredictability.}iana: That soy-sauce squirrel thing is, um... idk. Another Haiming-ism.

He had lost his mother. He had lost his father. He had lost his home. He had lost his chance at being loved. If he had his way, what he truly desired was the ability to live a quiet and peaceful life without any unpredictability.

_{While in bed, Xiao Ning received a message from Chen Ying. It was a simple one, reminding him not to turn on the air conditioning too high at night. The number she sent the message from seemed to have been the current one she got in A-City. She was probably afraid Xiao Ning hadn't saved the one from before.}
Xiao Ning opened his eyes and turned his body around, asking, "What's just right?"

_{"Well, that's because you always refuse to say it properly." Shan Haiming sat up and then helped Xiao Ning sit upright, too. Then, thinking its masters were playing, Tangtang rushed over and encircled Shan Haiming twice before lying down between the two.}Obviously, she hadn't dropped by Xiao Ning's house in person, probably because she didn't know his address. So the gifts were sent to his office, and because she didn't know what his hobbies and preferences were, the gifts sent were things a man would usually like, such as lighters, wallets, and cologne.

_{Xiao Ning hadn't expected at all that Shan Haiming would again bring up this old matter at such a time without warning. Then, with a turn of the head, he met that man's gaze. The youthful eyes peering into him were far too deep, and under the dim lights, they were as black as obsidian, gleaming with devotion and purity.}"No, it's not like that..." Xiao Ning felt the suffocating feeling that had ignited in his chest quell, and all that remained was exhaustion that made his body shrink into the bed. "I just remembered something from the past. I recalled how unpleasant my life had become after she had left."

_{Xiao Ning opened his eyes and turned his body around, asking, "What's just right?"}
"This, as in the way everything is now," Shan Haiming must've genuinely wanted to sleep at this point, so his next words were a bit rushed. "I walked my path and you walked yours, and in the end, we managed to find one another. Time to sleep, now. G'night."

Xiao Ning opened his eyes and turned his body around, asking, "What's just right?"

_{"It's not a matter of whether my heart softened or not..." Xiao Ning looked down at him to reply with a smile and a frown.}
After pressing his lips on Xiao Ning's forehead, Shan Haiming quickly fell asleep.

"It's not a matter of whether my heart softened or not..." Xiao Ning looked down at him to reply with a smile and a frown.

_N/AXiao Ning reached out his hand, cupping Shan Haiming's face. His heart felt as though a spotlight descended upon it, followed by a sudden and painful surge of joy from somewhere inside. The feeling told him one thing with certainty: that he had, for some time now, fallen deeply in love with this man.

N/A

_◈◇◈
Wrapped in that scent as well as his warmth, Xiao Ning lay there while his mind echoed those words.

◈◇◈

_{Xiao Ning's hands stalled, and Shan Haiming's eyes shot open, with him then going on to ask, "What are you thinking about?"}
Chen Ying sent him two to three messages a day, saying things like take care not to get sick; remember to eat your meals; stay hydrated; and be careful on his way to and from work. Xiao Ning was a bit new to this type of indirect concern. These kinds of superfluous messages were something he had never received before. Lu Yan was naturally out of the question; he didn't have it in him to do something like that at all. As for Chen Shuyun, the target of all her nagging had been Lu Yan, so Xiao Ning was nothing but a middleman. As for San Haiming, he would never engage in this type of drawn-out prodding.

Xiao Ning's hands stalled, and Shan Haiming's eyes shot open, with him then going on to ask, "What are you thinking about?"

_{He never answered him back then.}"No, it's not like that..." Xiao Ning felt the suffocating feeling that had ignited in his chest quell, and all that remained was exhaustion that made his body shrink into the bed. "I just remembered something from the past. I recalled how unpleasant my life had become after she had left."

He never answered him back then.

_{After he hung up the phone, Xiao Ning stared at it in a daze.}
Hence, these messages left Xiao Ning feeling rather conflicted. The image of Chen Ying's crying face that day kept reappearing before his eyes, and he sympathised with the pain she felt at not getting a response.

After he hung up the phone, Xiao Ning stared at it in a daze.

_{"This, as in the way everything is now," Shan Haiming must've genuinely wanted to sleep at this point, so his next words were a bit rushed. "I walked my path and you walked yours, and in the end, we managed to find one another. Time to sleep, now. G'night."}"This, as in the way everything is now," Shan Haiming must've genuinely wanted to sleep at this point, so his next words were a bit rushed. "I walked my path and you walked yours, and in the end, we managed to find one another. Time to sleep, now. G'night."

"This, as in the way everything is now," Shan Haiming must've genuinely wanted to sleep at this point, so his next words were a bit rushed. "I walked my path and you walked yours, and in the end, we managed to find one another. Time to sleep, now. G'night."

_{"Yeah. I'll get in touch with her again." Xiao Ning then chuckled to himself. {This guy is seriously treating me like a kid, isn't he?} Nodding, he then added, "But I think we both need some time to properly digest this first meeting of ours."}Xiao Ning lowered his head, connecting that man's lips with his own before they shared a gentle kiss.

_{{Lu Yan must've been very annoyed by me in the beginning too, yeah?}}Shan Haiming remained speechless for a moment, his lips then curving into a mischievous smile as he said, "Looks like there's been progress."

Lu Yan must've been very annoyed by me in the beginning too, yeah?

_{Xiao Ning smiled at this, as, regarding such a point, he also thought the same of Shan Haiming. In an environment like his, if it were a different person, odds are they would've developed a completely different attitude. Shan Haiming wasn't arrogant and twisted, nor was he a person who detested the world. Instead, he had grown into a fine man—an extremely fine one at that.}
But it was also because of this empathy that those unpleasant and dust-laden memories of his were constantly roused, and he found it difficult to contact Chen Ying. So those messages she sent were only saved while there was no response given.

_{But that was true for everything else except for one: this.}"It's a pity I didn't get to meet you back then," said Shan Haiming.

But that was true for everything else except for one: this.

_{Xiao Ning opened his eyes and turned his body around, asking, "What's just right?"}Shan Haiming then asked, "Can you handle this matter on your own?"

Xiao Ning opened his eyes and turned his body around, asking, "What's just right?"

_{Xiao Ning closed his eyes, chuckling softly. "Even if you had met me back then, you wouldn't be able to stand the sight of me. It was only after improving myself that I was even able to get to this point gradually."}
But Chen Ying was rather tenacious. Even though Xiao Ning hadn't sent her any replies, she still messaged him without end. Then, after only sending messages for half a month, she began sending him gifts as well.

Xiao Ning closed his eyes, chuckling softly. "Even if you had met me back then, you wouldn't be able to stand the sight of me. It was only after improving myself that I was even able to get to this point gradually."

_{Shan Haiming outstretched his hand, caressing Xiao Ning's face, seeming a bit distracted himself.}
Obviously, she hadn't dropped by Xiao Ning's house in person, probably because she didn't know his address. So the gifts were sent to his office, and because she didn't know what his hobbies and preferences were, the gifts sent were things a man would usually like, such as lighters, wallets, and cologne.

Shan Haiming outstretched his hand, caressing Xiao Ning's face, seeming a bit distracted himself.

_{{Who wouldn't be? Even I didn't like the me I was then.}}After he had lost hold of his feelings that day, Xiao Ning hadn't gotten that riled up again, and on top of that, he still wasn't sure how he could get along with Chen Ying. After all, there were a lot of years of estrangement between them, and accepting the presence of a mother in his life again suddenly made him feel uneasy.

Who wouldn't be? Even I didn't like the me I was then.

_{He also hooked Xiao Ning's neck while he spoke.}
Shan Haiming teased him when he saw this. "If you didn't know any better, you'd think you were her sugar baby or something."

He also hooked Xiao Ning's neck while he spoke.

Xiao Ning lowered his gaze, petting Xiaohei. Shan Haiming, from the side, then moved to caress Xiao Ning, his tone as he spoke filled with maturity. "You need to learn to grow up too."

_{Shan Haiming chuckled, unable to tell the meaning behind those words as he asked, "Did it touch your heart?"}
Embarrassed beyond measure, Xiao Ning had no choice but to contact Chen Ying. He thanked her for the concern and asked her not to send any more gifts. The second he sent this message, Chen Ying called him in return.

Shan Haiming chuckled, unable to tell the meaning behind those words as he asked, "Did it touch your heart?"

_You
"Ningning, have I troubled you a lot?" Chen Ying's tone sounded especially concerned, to the point that anyone hearing it would feel a pang in their heart. "I'm sorry, that wasn't my intention. I actually prepared gifts for you every year on your birthday, but I had no way to send them to you, so can I give them all to you on your birthday this year?"

You

_{Xiao Ning, whose hand lay on Tangtang's head while lost in thought, slowly nodded.}But it was also because of this empathy that those unpleasant and dust-laden memories of his were constantly roused, and he found it difficult to contact Chen Ying. So those messages she sent were only saved while there was no response given.

Xiao Ning, whose hand lay on Tangtang's head while lost in thought, slowly nodded.

_{These words of hers were rather touching, and Xiao Ning was in no way a person with a heart of stone. So, following a long sigh, he replied to her, "Um, alright. But don't send anything else, okay? There's no need to spend so much money."}
These words of hers were rather touching, and Xiao Ning was in no way a person with a heart of stone. So, following a long sigh, he replied to her, "Um, alright. But don't send anything else, okay? There's no need to spend so much money."

_{To have such a matter clarified in such a situation while discussing such a topic was quite amusing, and it is, unfortunately, something I can't tell you.}
Chen Ying was very satisfied with this attitude of his and fully agreed to his request.

To have such a matter clarified in such a situation while discussing such a topic was quite amusing, and it is, unfortunately, something I can't tell you.

_{Brimming with interest, Shan Haiming asked, "Did no one take pity on the little xiao-bai-cai that was you?" (Little Bok Choy)}Hence, these messages left Xiao Ning feeling rather conflicted. The image of Chen Ying's crying face that day kept reappearing before his eyes, and he sympathised with the pain she felt at not getting a response.

Brimming with interest, Shan Haiming asked, "Did no one take pity on the little xiao-bai-cai that was you?" (Little Bok Choy)

_{Smiling as if nothing was amiss, Xiao Ning chuckled as he replied, "We were talking about Chen Ying, won't we? I'm smiling because of how we went from talking to rolling around on the floor."}
After he hung up the phone, Xiao Ning stared at it in a daze.

Smiling as if nothing was amiss, Xiao Ning chuckled as he replied, "We were talking about Chen Ying, won't we? I'm smiling because of how we went from talking to rolling around on the floor."

_{"Yeah. I'll get in touch with her again." Xiao Ning then chuckled to himself. This guy is seriously treating me like a kid, isn't he? Nodding, he then added, "But I think we both need some time to properly digest this first meeting of ours."}
Shan Haiming was leaning on the sofa beside him, feet propped on Tangtang's back. After turning to look at Xiao Ning's face, he laid his head on his dazed partner's lap and asked, while looking up at him, "Has your heart softened?"

_{iana: That soy-sauce squirrel thing is, um... idk. Another Haiming-ism.}Sensing his restlessness, Shan Haiming asked from behind him, "Can't sleep?"

iana: That soy-sauce squirrel thing is, um... idk. Another Haiming-ism.

_{Shan Haiming's brows wrinkled as he then asked, "What are you all smiles about?"}Lu Yan must've been very annoyed by me in the beginning too, yeah?

Shan Haiming's brows wrinkled as he then asked, "What are you all smiles about?"

_{Xiao Ning smiled at this, as, regarding such a point, he also thought the same of Shan Haiming. In an environment like his, if it were a different person, odds are they would've developed a completely different attitude. Shan Haiming wasn't arrogant and twisted, nor was he a person who detested the world. Instead, he had grown into a fine man—an extremely fine one at that.}Obviously, she hadn't dropped by Xiao Ning's house in person, probably because she didn't know his address. So the gifts were sent to his office, and because she didn't know what his hobbies and preferences were, the gifts sent were things a man would usually like, such as lighters, wallets, and cologne.

_{Brimming with interest, Shan Haiming asked, "Did no one take pity on the little xiao-bai-cai that was you?" (Little Bok Choy)}
"It's not a matter of whether my heart softened or not..." Xiao Ning looked down at him to reply with a smile and a frown.

Brimming with interest, Shan Haiming asked, "Did no one take pity on the little xiao-bai-cai that was you?" (Little Bok Choy)

_{This was strange—quite strange, in fact. It was rare for Shan Haiming to act like this. So, running his fingers along his temples, Xiao Ning asked him, "What's on your mind right now?"}Embarrassed beyond measure, Xiao Ning had no choice but to contact Chen Ying. He thanked her for the concern and asked her not to send any more gifts. The second he sent this message, Chen Ying called him in return.

This was strange—quite strange, in fact. It was rare for Shan Haiming to act like this. So, running his fingers along his temples, Xiao Ning asked him, "What's on your mind right now?"

_{Shan Haiming then asked outrightly, "So you're afraid you won't have any control? You're afraid of what your mother will do to you?"}He never answered him back then.

Shan Haiming then asked outrightly, "So you're afraid you won't have any control? You're afraid of what your mother will do to you?"

_{Hence, these messages left Xiao Ning feeling rather conflicted. The image of Chen Ying's crying face that day kept reappearing before his eyes, and he sympathised with the pain she felt at not getting a response.}Lying in the dark, Xiao Ning stared at his phone until the screen automatically dimmed; only then did he again return it to the stand beside him. His movements alerted the one behind him and caused an arm to encircle his waist, holding him tight.

_{After he had lost hold of his feelings that day, Xiao Ning hadn't gotten that riled up again, and on top of that, he still wasn't sure how he could get along with Chen Ying. After all, there were a lot of years of estrangement between them, and accepting the presence of a mother in his life again suddenly made him feel uneasy.}
After he had lost hold of his feelings that day, Xiao Ning hadn't gotten that riled up again, and on top of that, he still wasn't sure how he could get along with Chen Ying. After all, there were a lot of years of estrangement between them, and accepting the presence of a mother in his life again suddenly made him feel uneasy.

_{{Who wouldn't be? Even I didn't like the me I was then.}}Looking at him with a smile, Xiao Ning replied simply, "You."

Who wouldn't be? Even I didn't like the me I was then.

_{"I honestly did hate Chen Ying, but that was only when I was still a child. Honestly, it's not even about forgiveness." Xiao Ning stroked Tangtang's head, while from a distance, Xiaohei swung its tail and looked at them intently. "I just... It's just that I don't like it when there are too many variables."}
Shan Haiming outstretched his hand, caressing Xiao Ning's face, seeming a bit distracted himself.

"I honestly did hate Chen Ying, but that was only when I was still a child. Honestly, it's not even about forgiveness." Xiao Ning stroked Tangtang's head, while from a distance, Xiaohei swung its tail and looked at them intently. "I just... It's just that I don't like it when there are too many variables."

_{He was a person who lived his life by the book—a person who was left restless when something unforeseen happened to him. The reason for this was simple: any time an unexpected event occurred in his life, it was always a bad thing. Change, for him, had become indicative of a loss.}Hence, these messages left Xiao Ning feeling rather conflicted. The image of Chen Ying's crying face that day kept reappearing before his eyes, and he sympathised with the pain she felt at not getting a response.

_{It was precisely his not seeming to have only experienced a good past that had created the parts of him that Xiao Ning found the most attractive.}Shan Haiming then asked outrightly, "So you're afraid you won't have any control? You're afraid of what your mother will do to you?"

It was precisely his not seeming to have only experienced a good past that had created the parts of him that Xiao Ning found the most attractive.

_{Brimming with interest, Shan Haiming asked, "Did no one take pity on the little xiao-bai-cai that was you?" (Little Bok Choy)}Back then, Xiao Ning didn't talk to others, and even he didn't like the timid and fearful child he remembered, who had a dirty and uncared-for appearance. The way he looked at others also made him look as though he was a bit slow-witted. What's more, and possibly the result of him being too accustomed to the quiet that came with always being alone, he would often stare intently at one spot for far too long until his gaze was filled with darkness.

Brimming with interest, Shan Haiming asked, "Did no one take pity on the little xiao-bai-cai that was you?" (Little Bok Choy)

_{He had lost his mother. He had lost his father. He had lost his home. He had lost his chance at being loved. If he had his way, what he truly desired was the ability to live a quiet and peaceful life without any unpredictability.}
This was strange—quite strange, in fact. It was rare for Shan Haiming to act like this. So, running his fingers along his temples, Xiao Ning asked him, "What's on your mind right now?"

_{Obviously, she hadn't dropped by Xiao Ning's house in person, probably because she didn't know his address. So the gifts were sent to his office, and because she didn't know what his hobbies and preferences were, the gifts sent were things a man would usually like, such as lighters, wallets, and cologne.}
"Nothing much." Shan Haiming closed his eyes, feeling soothed by Xiao Ning's caressing touch through his hair, then added, "I think you're someone worthy of praise. You had so many troubles for so long, yet you still managed to not become a twisted person."

Obviously, she hadn't dropped by Xiao Ning's house in person, probably because she didn't know his address. So the gifts were sent to his office, and because she didn't know what his hobbies and preferences were, the gifts sent were things a man would usually like, such as lighters, wallets, and cologne.

_{Sensing his restlessness, Shan Haiming asked from behind him, "Can't sleep?"}To which, Xiao Ning responded with a sigh at the realisation that he couldn't hide it. "Chen Ying just sent me a message. She said I should be careful not to let the A/C get too cold."

Sensing his restlessness, Shan Haiming asked from behind him, "Can't sleep?"

_{iana: That soy-sauce squirrel thing is, um... idk. Another Haiming-ism.}
Xiao Ning smiled at this, as, regarding such a point, he also thought the same of Shan Haiming. In an environment like his, if it were a different person, odds are they would've developed a completely different attitude. Shan Haiming wasn't arrogant and twisted, nor was he a person who detested the world. Instead, he had grown into a fine man—an extremely fine one at that.

iana: That soy-sauce squirrel thing is, um... idk. Another Haiming-ism.

_{"Nothing much." Shan Haiming closed his eyes, feeling soothed by Xiao Ning's caressing touch through his hair, then added, "I think you're someone worthy of praise. You had so many troubles for so long, yet you still managed to not become a twisted person."}These words of hers were rather touching, and Xiao Ning was in no way a person with a heart of stone. So, following a long sigh, he replied to her, "Um, alright. But don't send anything else, okay? There's no need to spend so much money."

_{This was a question Shan Haiming had also asked him in the past. Back then, the two had only met one another through a chance encounter, and Xiao Ning was left at a loss by Shan Haiming's straightforwardness as well as having his anger ignited for some unknown reason.}Right then, Xiaohei finally made its way over to its owners with gracefully silent steps, then curled up on the cross-legged Xiao Ning's lap, joining the rest of the family.

_{It was precisely his not seeming to have only experienced a good past that had created the parts of him that Xiao Ning found the most attractive.}
It was precisely his not seeming to have only experienced a good past that had created the parts of him that Xiao Ning found the most attractive.

It was precisely his not seeming to have only experienced a good past that had created the parts of him that Xiao Ning found the most attractive.

_N/AXiao Ning was left temporarily speechless by the intensity of the stare befalling him—a gaze that resembled one of a person who had claimed a throne.

N/A

_{Xiao Ning was left temporarily speechless by the intensity of the stare befalling him—a gaze that resembled one of a person who had claimed a throne.}
Xiao Ning's hands stalled, and Shan Haiming's eyes shot open, with him then going on to ask, "What are you thinking about?"

Xiao Ning was left temporarily speechless by the intensity of the stare befalling him—a gaze that resembled one of a person who had claimed a throne.

_{In the dimly lit room, Xiao Ning's mellow tone resounded. Even the tranquillity of the night seemed to have been enveloped in his smooth masculine tone and, with it, gave a feeling of peace. It lulled Shan Haiming, urging him to sleep, so his next words came out as a whisper: "So {this} is just right then, yeah?"}This was a question Shan Haiming had also asked him in the past. Back then, the two had only met one another through a chance encounter, and Xiao Ning was left at a loss by Shan Haiming's straightforwardness as well as having his anger ignited for some unknown reason.

In the dimly lit room, Xiao Ning's mellow tone resounded. Even the tranquillity of the night seemed to have been enveloped in his smooth masculine tone and, with it, gave a feeling of peace. It lulled Shan Haiming, urging him to sleep, so his next words came out as a whisper: "So this is just right then, yeah?"

_◈◇◈Xiao Ning smiled at this, as, regarding such a point, he also thought the same of Shan Haiming. In an environment like his, if it were a different person, odds are they would've developed a completely different attitude. Shan Haiming wasn't arrogant and twisted, nor was he a person who detested the world. Instead, he had grown into a fine man—an extremely fine one at that.

◈◇◈

_{Chen Ying sent him two to three messages a day, saying things like take care not to get sick; remember to eat your meals; stay hydrated; and be careful on his way to and from work. Xiao Ning was a bit new to this type of indirect concern.}
Shan Haiming remained speechless for a moment, his lips then curving into a mischievous smile as he said, "Looks like there's been progress."

_{{To have such a matter clarified in such a situation while discussing such a topic was quite amusing, and it is, unfortunately, something I can't tell you.}}To have such a matter clarified in such a situation while discussing such a topic was quite amusing, and it is, unfortunately, something I can't tell you.

To have such a matter clarified in such a situation while discussing such a topic was quite amusing, and it is, unfortunately, something I can't tell you.

_{While in bed, Xiao Ning received a message from Chen Ying. It was a simple one, reminding him not to turn on the air conditioning too high at night. The number she sent the message from seemed to have been the current one she got in A-City. She was probably afraid Xiao Ning hadn't saved the one from before.}These words of hers were rather touching, and Xiao Ning was in no way a person with a heart of stone. So, following a long sigh, he replied to her, "Um, alright. But don't send anything else, okay? There's no need to spend so much money."

_N/A
He also hooked Xiao Ning's neck while he spoke.

N/A

_{Shan Haiming was leaning on the sofa beside him, feet propped on Tangtang's back. After turning to look at Xiao Ning's face, he laid his head on his dazed partner's lap and asked, while looking up at him, "Has your heart softened?"}Obviously, she hadn't dropped by Xiao Ning's house in person, probably because she didn't know his address. So the gifts were sent to his office, and because she didn't know what his hobbies and preferences were, the gifts sent were things a man would usually like, such as lighters, wallets, and cologne.

_{These words of hers were rather touching, and Xiao Ning was in no way a person with a heart of stone. So, following a long sigh, he replied to her, "Um, alright. But don't send anything else, okay? There's no need to spend so much money."}He was a person who lived his life by the book—a person who was left restless when something unforeseen happened to him. The reason for this was simple: any time an unexpected event occurred in his life, it was always a bad thing. Change, for him, had become indicative of a loss.

_{Since he said all this, Shan Haiming let the matter be. He then dragged him along to do the dishes, in addition to taking care of Tangtang and Xiaohei, who had to get their baths.}This was the best-unexpected event he could think of.

Since he said all this, Shan Haiming let the matter be. He then dragged him along to do the dishes, in addition to taking care of Tangtang and Xiaohei, who had to get their baths.

_{Sensing his restlessness, Shan Haiming asked from behind him, "Can't sleep?"}
Xiao Ning lowered his head, connecting that man's lips with his own before they shared a gentle kiss.

Sensing his restlessness, Shan Haiming asked from behind him, "Can't sleep?"

_{Xiao Ning lowered his gaze, petting Xiaohei. Shan Haiming, from the side, then moved to caress Xiao Ning, his tone as he spoke filled with maturity. "You need to learn to grow up too."}To which, Xiao Ning responded with a sigh at the realisation that he couldn't hide it. "Chen Ying just sent me a message. She said I should be careful not to let the A/C get too cold."

Xiao Ning lowered his gaze, petting Xiaohei. Shan Haiming, from the side, then moved to caress Xiao Ning, his tone as he spoke filled with maturity. "You need to learn to grow up too."

Author's Note:

N/A

Notes:

iana: That soy-sauce squirrel thing is, um... idk. Another Haiming-ism.

The Long Road Ahead: C57

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